Topmug365 – Not All Who Wander Are Lost Some Are Looking For Cool Rocks Mug

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Joli Hamilton, Ph.D., a research psychologist, told me CNM is about “returning agency” to your partner. She and her second husband, Ken, who have seven children between them, live in small-town Massachusetts. They “look like soccer parents,” she says, and when we Zoom she’s in a perky high ponytail and Ken wears a Grinch-printed holiday hoodie—but their shared Google calendar is alight with plans with other partners, mostly friends with benefits, sometimes boyfriends or girlfriends. (All but one of their adult children are supportive.)

Not All Who Wander Are Lost Some Are Looking For Cool Rocks Mug

If the Smiths’ openness felt like a watershed, the terms they used were not new. Freedom is the oft-cited benefit among the consensually non-monogamous. “It’s about allowing freedom in the most respectful way,” says the Feeld CEO Kirova. “I don’t want to put any borders around the way my partner explores the world, neither do I want borders.”

Not All Who Wander Are Lost Some Are Looking For Cool Rocks Mug Mug den

Like pineapples and Adirondack chairs, cake is another symbol linked to CNM: a nod to having it and eating it too. And yet CNM is not without complications. The English designer Tina’s first CNM relationship fell apart due to a lack of communication: “We didn’t check in with each other. We just thought, Well, if something is not working, we could go get it elsewhere.” (Tina only half jokes that CNM is “99 percent talking and 1 percent sex.”) Opening relationships that are already flailing rarely saves them—“like having a kid to fix a relationship, it’s not going to work,” said Moors—and social stigma persists. Members of the CNM community worry that they could be ostracized by family, attacked as parents, or lose their jobs, as polyamorous people are not legally protected from discrimination.

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